Answers

It's frustrating at times; looking to the Bible for answers. I say this not because I don't believe the answers the Bible contains are are valuable, on the contrary, they are precious. I say this because oft times, the answers the Bible offers are rarely the answers to the questions we have in the first place.

Just today, I was sitting at the counter with two objects in front of me. My bible and this computer. I've been in a place lately where I'm constantly searching for direction. Do I investigate the possibility of school? Of various job opportunities? Of doing something like YWAM? (for those of you who are not familiar, Youth With A Mission is a Christian organization dedicated to being and making disciples of Christ. They offer various training programs and opportunities to serve in missions all over the globe.) As I contemplated these things and more, I asked God, "What do you want me to do?" Then I started to reach for the computer to start googling through some of these different ideas. It occurred to me that it was a little silly that I would expect God to "speak" to me as I was browsing through pages and pages of the information super highway....when I had his living and active Word sitting within arms reach. So I closed the computer and opened the Bible to the book of Ephesians.

I read about Christ's power and authority. I read about how Christ chose and predestined us to share in his inheritance and the praise of his glory. I read about how we are to be excited about the promise we have in Christ. About how the Holy Spirit is a deposit guaranteeing the things that are yet to come as a result of our salvation. I read about how we are one in Christ together with all of creation which at the end times will all come together and be restored for the purpose of God's glory.

These are all good things. They are all valuable answers. They do not, however, answer the questions I have today. How I wish, sometimes, that I could open my Bible one day and have my eyes fall upon words like, "Leigh Cara, It is my will that you go back to work on a cruise ship/apply for this college/seek that job in this city...." God doesn't seem to answer in these ways though. Instead, he says to us, "Love your neighbor as yourself." "Go and make disciples of all nations." "Pray on all occasions." Just last night I read the passage of scripture that says tells us not to worry about our lives. That God knows what our needs are so we are to "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well" (Matthew 6:33).

All of these little details in life that we fret over and spend all of our time trying to come up with solutions to are merely afterthoughts. Or at least, God's word suggests to us that they should be. Questions like "How am I going to support myself? How am I going to pay my bills and keep a roof over my head and put food on my table?" Afterthoughts. Crazy, huh?

I suppose the questions I should be asking are, "How do I make an impact for Christ and his kingdom today?" "Who around me does not know Christ and has not received his salvation?" "What is the best way for me to demonstrate Christ's love to somebody who is hurting?". I suppose that when we align our hearts with God and start to ask the right questions, we will find the answers we seek. Specific answers and instructions even, for the scenarios we will find ourselves in. Not to mention encouragement for the hardships we will inevitably endure as we step into our role as the "hands and feet" of Christ and really take ownership of our responsibility to step up and answer his call to serve him and others.

I have so much to learn about what it means to die unto myself in order to have life through Christ...

At what point did life tell us it was okay to stop dreaming?

It seems that the older we get, the more practical we are encouraged to be. This is not necessarily a bad thing. Practicality has its place. We all have bills to pay and need money for food, clothing, shelter, etc.... Somewhere along the way though, we learned that once you've got your basic needs met, that's all you need to concern yourself with. If you've got the job that affords you the comfortable existence, you're free to let your dreams evaporate.



This is such a dangerous mindset for the human heart. We're created as dreamers. When we're kids we wile the hours away playing make-believe. We have lofty aspirations of being doctors, lawyers, inventors, rock-stars. As we get older, dreaming becomes more difficult. Questions start to come up; How will you pay for your education? Will you even be accepted into a reputable school's program? How do you even know which schools are reputable? Or, if you're like me, the questions are more along the lines of; How will you get in front of the right record producers? Will they even like your music? With so many people trying to do the same thing, what sets you apart? Once these questions start, discouragement sets in. Life tells you to start coming up with a "Plan B" because there is something about our ability to dream, (and dream BIG) that begins to feel like it was better left in our childhood. We decide these lofty aspirations are juvenile like the place they originated from and leave them behind us as we adopt a more "adult" way of thinking.

This saddens my heart deeply. I caught myself falling victim to this same trap just this morning. It all started from a place of practical responsibility. I recognized that even as I am pursuing my dreams as a songwriter/artist, etc, I need to do something to make ends meet in the interim. While waiting tables is decent enough money, it's not exactly what's I'd call "fulfilling". The one thing I could imagine myself doing "for a living" as I pursue my bigger dreams is being involved in the fitness industry somehow be it a pilates instructor, personal trainer or what have you. From there my thought process looked something like this;

I don't want to go to college just for the sake of going to college. If I'm going to commit to furthering my education, I want it to be in something I'm passionate about and something that will actually contribute directly to what I will do in the future. Rather than finishing my degree in a program that isn't quite what I want to study, I could complete the necessary coursework/certification to become a pilates instructor or personal trainer. Then I could be doing something I enjoy as I continue to pursue my aspirations as a song-writer.

That was where it ended. You may be confused. You may ask, "What's the problem with what you just said? Isn't that an ideal solution for everything you've been talking about thus far?" Wrong. The problem is; it ended with my aspirations as a songwriter. That was as far as I got...


After I spend some time thinking and journaling about this today, I turned on Taylor Swift's album "Fearless". (Bear with me here...) As soon as the music started to play, I broke down into tears. I told God, "I don't want to pretend that I want to be anything less than what I really want to be". You see, my dream has ALWAYS been to be a professional recording artist. Being a songwriter is a part of that, and it may be an essential part of the journey to getting there eventually, but it's not the end of the road for me. In my practical thinking this morning, that was where my dream stopped. Practicality replaced the genuine desires of my heart. The desires that have been written on my heart for as long as I can remember.

Friends.... We cannot let the fact that we are growing up give us an excuse to grow out of our dreams. The very essence of who we are is contained at the heart of these desires we became aware of so long ago. They are a part of what makes us who we are. Please, do not sacrifice yourself in the name of being a practical adult. It's not worth it. I would hate to arrive at the end of my life and have "I was provided for" be all I had to say for it. I realize, there is more to life than our vocational aspirations. There is service to God and relationships with our loved ones which in the end are far more important than any selfish ambition we may have for ourselves. We cannot, however, deny such a central part of ourselves.

If you have dreams, pray....and find ways to make them into your reality.